Agreeing · Answer
Can we communicate only through the agent while we sell?
The short answer
For the sale itself, yes. I send both of you the same written updates, offers and documents at the same time, and each of you replies to me separately. You don't have to speak to each other to sell the house. Anything legal or personal still goes through your attorneys, because I'm not a go-between for the divorce.
- 01
Yes, for the sale
A house can sell between two people who aren't talking. I set up a single written channel: every update goes to both of you, by email, in the same message. If one of you prefers text, you both get texts. When a decision is needed, like accepting an offer or agreeing to a repair, each of you answers me separately and in writing. You never have to be in the same room. Because the same message reaches both of you at the same moment, neither of you has to wonder whether the other heard something first, and that alone takes a lot of heat out of a sale.
Short replies are fine. Yes, no or call me is enough.
- 02
What goes to your attorneys
I'm not a messenger for the divorce. Questions about who gets which share, what the judgment means, whether one of you owes the other money or how the consent to sell should read are legal questions. They go to your attorneys, who can talk to each other. If one of you sends me something that belongs there, I'll say so and leave it out of what goes to the other spouse.
That line keeps the sale clean. It also keeps me from becoming part of the fight, which helps both of you more than you'd think. If the attorneys want copies of the sale updates, I'm glad to send the same message to both of them as well, with both of your permission.
- 03
How decisions get made
Big decisions work best when they're agreed before they come up. That's why I ask you both to sign a pricing plan before listing, with price changes set for specific dates, as described in we can't agree on the list price. It means fewer decisions under pressure. When an offer arrives, both of you see it at the same moment and respond on your own. Every message that asks for a decision has a deadline in it, so silence never gets mistaken for a yes. If you disagree, I tell both of you that you disagree, and the next step is yours or your attorneys'.
The guide on selling when you're not speaking sets out the whole system, including a sample update.
Confidential consult
Your situation, specifically.
Tell me where things stand. I’ll tell you what the sale could look like for your situation, and what to ask your attorney first.